There are a number of topics that I've been wanting to indulge in that I haven't had the time to do but will get to eventually, including match-making services as well as long-distance "dating" in the New Economy, and how they both apply to those of us in the international community living and working in Taiwan today. I have a lot to say about both -- the good, the bad, and the hysterical -- wink wink.

Today however, I'm going to talk about some of the real challenges we face as first-generation Chinese Americans, particularly with respect to the ramifications of belonging to such a tight-knit community.

On the one hand, the friendships that are made run very deep, so deep that even now at my wise old age, I sometimes still don't understand it. It has something to do with the family obligations... the language... our upbringing... and the fact that we are always in the minority no matter what country we live in. So deep that we are often accused of being cliquish and even arrogant... so deep that our network extends to a vast and yet very tight group of people on both sides of the Pacific --

'Tis indeed a small world in which we live.

First-generation Chinese Americans -- and I include those who left Taiwan in their early teens -- are in the most unique position of belonging intimately to both societies, and yet never really belonging to either 100%. With it comes privileges and challenges, advantages and disadvantages, things we learn to balance and sometimes, just accept. But there are downsides to being part of this close-knit community. One of them is the gossip that spreads, and the damage it brings.

I have been and always will be proud to be who I am, as a Chinese American, as a woman, and as a friend. I live my life responsibly and with integrity, and I treat those around me accordingly. I have no qualms about throwing myself in the spotlight and exposing myself to criticism and to controversy, if it helps me meet my personal and professional goals -- a fact of (my) life that I fully embrace.

But every once in awhile, when word gets back to me from across the Pacific Ocean about malicious comments said by someone I know, someone whom I may not have always agreed with but whom I trusted and respected as a peer
in the Chinese American community, I cannot but be disappointed.

I am not one to hold grudges. Nor will I ever speak unfavorably of this person, as it would serve to accomplish very little. But what comes to my mind is this, that although he has absolutely nothing to lose by challenging my credibility and the decisions I've made, by doing so... neither does he have to gain.

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