I know I've written you some pretty frustrating ramblings via email and perhaps it's given you *one* side of who I am, but please please know that if there is ever someone on this planet earth who doesn't give up on herself or what she believes in, it would be me.

There. I just said it. I belong to this region.

Congratulations! You've finally got yourself ORIENTED.

Now, realizing that you belong to this region, the various decisions facing you in this life should be a bit less complicated.

My thinking is that if you are a normal human being (i.e., like me), then surely you must get discouraged from time to time -- especially with some of the stuff on ORIENTED. So, feeling an uncontrollable compulsion to open my mouth, I come out with profound "encouragements" like "Hang in there" and "Don't let the xxxxx get you down," etc. If you spoke Japanese, I would say, "Ganbatte, yo!" And you would reply, "Hai!
Ganbarimasu!"

Hey, that's a good idea! I'm going to blame it on the Japanese. They have influenced me. It's not my fault!

Our close friends and family all know this and sometimes give us CRAP for it, saying that we are probably two of the most idiotic people on this planet earth to have spent so much time on a community project when we *should* spend our time more "wisely" and on more "practical" things like getting a REAL JOB, getting MARRIED, and having KIDS! (Errr... not with each other... ahem...)

To which Ben Seale asks,

NONE OF YOUR DAMNED BUSINESS!!

why are you bringing home boxes from work? You can get Fedex 25kg boxes -- fedex will even deliver them (if you ask nicely).

I have to say that in HK, I really get annoyed with Chinese people talking English to one another. They are also always slagging off HK and all things Chinese. WHY??

I came to HK 2 years ago and my Chinese was terrible. I made an effort to improve my Chinese and now I am pretty much indistingishable from a local. I did that by speaking only Chinese whenever I can. Even to foreigners!(I am living in a southern city of China)
What I don't understand is why Chinese people hate their heritage so much? Yes, there are things wrong with our traditional culture, like you cousin's observations about music. BUT there are many good things that has helped all of us to become successful.

Your lead in statements was a bit of a worry and bugged me hence this post. What's all that stuff about Chinese American close knit mumbo jumbo.

Quote:
"I'm going to talk about some of the real challenges we face as first-generation Chinese Americans, particularly with respect to the ramifications of belonging to such a tight-knit community. .... On the one hand, the friendships that are made run very deep, so deep that even now at my wise old age, I sometimes still don't understand it. It has something to do with the family obligations... the language... our upbringing... and the fact that we are always in the minority no matter what country we live in. So deep that we are often accused of being cliquish and even arrogant... so deep that our network extends to a vast and yet very tight group of people on both sides of the Pacific"

Things I think are just plain mumbo jumbo!
1. Friendships run deep because you and your friend(s) CHOOSE to have a deep relationship. It has absolutely nothing to do with being Chinese American. There are deep friendships all over the world within all the variants that exists on the globe (Anyone not in your group would rightly think you were arrogant if not just a snob).

2. Being a minority is a state of mind. I cannot for the life of me understand how you feel that you are in the minority. You seem to have a wonderful extended family (as evident from your reunion). You also seem to have a great fun group of friends (as evident from your webring etc). So what's all this minority mumbo jumbo? We are in no way a minority, there are several billion ethnic chinese in this world.

3. Deep relationships and cliques are TWO VERY DIFFERENT THINGS!! Ever read Romeo & Juliet? Romeo and Juliet had a deep relationship. Their families were cliques. Get it?

4. People slag people off because THEY HAVE AN UNRESOLVED ISSUE within themselves or with the other person, and again it has absolutely nothing to do with being Chinese American, Anglo Spaniard, French Canadian, or Aboriginal Brazilian. People slag people off all over the world, and usually about the same mindless things.

5. I agree that given your background and roots being attached to several places you will feel like; "of belonging intimately to both societies, and yet never really belonging to either 100%". BUT it is in no way (not even close) as being unique to Chinese Americans. I am not a Chinese American and I always have this feeling, therefore it is not unique. (a simple proof by contradiction)
It extends beyond the reference points that you state, because as the globe becomes smaller and smaller people will get the opportunity to extend beyond their original communities. As a result this type of "belonging" issue will continue until everyone's reference of "belonging" shifts to a new paradigm.

Sorry to be harsh but I just thought you were talking total gobbledi****.

Come on Christine, you are far more intelligent than that. Some idiot slagged you off, so as you would say "GET ORIENTATED" and forget about that totally disorientated dude.

Maybe all your activities from the last couple months have finally caught up with you. Seems like you've been on the "go" for quite awhile. Looks like its time for Chris to take time for Chris. Be sure to drink lotsa water, maybe your just a little dehydrated. (GET WELL SOON)

You all look wonderful!

Great job!